days where i can’t write and days where i need to write every day.
and it’s just the need to sit and put words on paper. there is no need to tell a story or to make a memory permanent. it’s just the act of words on paper.
and it was about pen to paper and now it’s more about typing away on my laptop.
i’ve started writing my daily tarot readings and my handwriting and spelling, epp. i don’t think my head can keep up with my brain and i write words mushed together in ways that is not right for humans.
i can’t type, i can’t spell, handwriting is bad, my nails need to be cut to keep using the laptop and my phone, but yet the need for words on paper overrides all that.
need to hurt and rip flesh and want to hug and love him.
i need to go to bed.
something shifted in me last week and i don’t know what it really was.
i’m on a mission. every day, a minimum of 20 minutes of cleaning my living space. i started on the far end, trying to make it to the front.
i’ve hit the bathroom. i want to Unfuck Your Habit clean it on Wednesday. right now, it’s just picking up the random shit in there. i want to reorganized it and throw out all the shit i’m not using any more.
along with all that, i’ve really been hitting the studying. after having some decks for months and not doing anything with them, i’ve read up on my Supernatural tarot deck and trying to go down the path of Lenormand. the Lenormand might be trickier then i thought but, i need to start throwing cards if i’m gonna learn to use them.
cleaning and cartomancy, that is what takes up my time nowadays. it’s fall, it’s October, it’s 2 fucking weeks till Halloween. mom turned the heat on for the 1st time today and, i just feel it now.
it’s the Season of the Witch.
