the cards said to write and here i am

the cards said to write and here i am.

things are good. things are moving forward. i need to pick up speed but overall, i am content with myself.

Lent started today and i be damn if an asshole tried to manplain it to me. 8 years of Catholic wasn’t for nothing, motherfucker.

keep having chats with Izzy about stuff and, i’m going down a path i never thought i would. i don’t know if i am 100% certain and don’t know if i will live up to what they want but i am willing to try.

i have high hopes we see each other next week. i have hope in myself that i can live up to the texts i’ve been sending him.

i want to talk to Nicole but i am hesitant about it. i don’t know if i can commit to something so why ask for advice?

Fat Monday

want to write, have nothing to write.

Wednesday is Ash/Fish Day and i will be damn if any one tries to explain it to me.

trying to get another date with Izzy and shit keeps coming up. the texts, i think i am in danger but the good kind.

i think i am in good hands.

i just want those hands on me.

today marks 3 years of being celibate and being a recreational marijuana user. it also marks being 2 years single and 10 months of texting Izzy.

i am moving forward. just not in the ways i think i would be.

time to get some shit done to do The Work tonight.

blar

well, it’s been a week.

work has been a trip, mostly due to higher ups coming in and being dicks. that’s all i have to say about that shit.

Sims have been fun and i am trying to work a good balance of playing them and getting The Work done.

the cards say to study and i am failing with that. i need to clean a bit to get to the studying.

Witchcraft VII

What kind of deities, if any, do I want to honor?

 

Karpo. She is the Greek goddess of fall. I have fallen off the wagon so bad that a goal of this year is to get back into a devotion towards her.

Witchcraft Prompts

What's It All About?

i am still here. i only wanted to take January “off” and kick off February and then life happens.

i have been slacking. i tried playing Sims 4 and i just don’t care for the game. off chance i went to look to see if they had Sims 2 and they did. all of them for $30.

and down that hole i went, bad.

i am failing with doing The Work and that needs to stop, now. i am not moving forward and that is someone i don’t want to be.

the basement is getting cleaner, i have a job i like that is 1,000 times less stressful, i have a Bear in Rolla that likes me and wants me, i have my wonderful friends in Springfield, i have the fucking best niblings in the world, too many things are positive in my life for me to turn into mush.

so, tonight is the last night of goofing off. i need to buckle up and get to The Work. i need to step up my reading and studying. i need to get going with the cleaning.

is this all going to happen overnight? no. will i have setbacks, in this month alone? yes? can i read one page a day? fuck yes, i can do at least that.

let’s get going.