another week of just moving the barest of inches.
i keep adding to this year’s goals and, am i pushing myself or just insane? or both?
i need to stop with the time wasting of phone and video game. i need to focus on The Work.
it’s also the idea that it is still August and nothing is suppose to get done in August. i have hit my goal for September already so, working on October.
done for the month, 66% done for the year, giving me a B grade.
i am working on September’s goals right now.
did the witchcraft yesterday, tonight it is getting the full moon treatment.
and it’s the 1st full moon of summer. THE full moon for love magic!
is my witchcraft love magic? kinda? maybe? ain’t all magic love magic?
i need a drink.
i am done with my goals for the month, 64% done for the year, giving me a B-.
and i got a date this month.
i really want to work and get all of September’s goals done. i don’t know if that is possible but i can fucking try.
and the date this month, just realized that i haven’t been on a first date in 20 years and this is the 1st person i found all on my own in 23 years.
there are things i want to say but i don’t want to put out there in this world’s internet.
or just put them out there at all. words have power.
fuck, i casted a spell with my fucking Tinder profile.
and there is magic i’m planning on working next week, full moon and all.
and it’s for my date.
:-)
weekly update
i am 112% done with June’s goals, 61% for the year, giving me a B!
by tomorrow i’ll be 97% done with July’s goal.
i have been doing so much thinking about everything this past month.
i was off for 3 days in a row and didn’t do anything. i don’t need to do that any more.
i’m happy. i did not realized how much working at ThE sToRe was killing me till i was gone of it.
my new job is no thought, just do. same thing every day, nothing wild or crazy dropping on me, out of the blue. no one is a cheerleader/drank the Kool-Aid/joined the cult.
i met someone, a real human and not “…there is an idea of a Patrick Bateman…”. i keep asking if this is how a relationship is suppose to be.
i want to date him.
i want other things.
also, today the random memory of how “On My Own” and “I Don’t Know How to Love Him” were my themes and songs one semester.
i am so not that bitch any more.
the cards keep telling me that part of the healing is moving onto the next level. i have done that and i need to.
i wanted to be better, and now that i am, i am wasting it.
no, that’s makes me the same before the healing.
fuck…..
again, it hit me the other day.
i have time. i can use that time for things.
things like working out.
i don’t know why it takes me so long to sort this shit out.
i do need to focus myself. i need to sit down and write out a plan on what the hell i want to do and when to do it. i am burning time when i could be burning myself and becoming something better.
i am 88% done with June’s goals, 48% done for the year, giving me a D+.
i got so much cleaning done this month that i am able to work on other projects now!
and PRIDE starts tomorrow!
i am moving forward and upward and only getting better. May was a month to reset and my ass ran with it.
i put in my first day of work. some things don’t change and some things are way different.
i was sent home early because of labor. i know i am low man on the food chain but, i kept up with bread during breakfast and didn’t freak out during our rush.
i call it a win.
i came home and sat down, did some piddling and thought i should be doing something!
there is nothing to do…
there is stuff to do, but cleaning had always bogged me down. there was just, always some thing that i needed to catch up, to do. and not right now.
June will start a new month and a new list of things, but in this last few days, nope. i have done it all.
the basement, it is clean.
my fucking closet is organized.
i am living my best life.
we are moving forward.
and yes, my pronoun is we.
i hit my goals for April, and with 7 days left, trying to get more done. i know i need to pack and all that for my trip but, let me sit for a hot min.
and it’s Disco Night at the bar! i haven’t been since 2023 and i am so ready for it! i know i’m going in with my county shit so, Urban Cowboy?
i want to work on my Book of Shadows (really thinking of renaming it) and my Book of Cartomancy today. need to put away the laundry, and start packing.
and work out.
so much to do, time to get going.
i am 112% done for the month, 20% done for the year, giving me a D. whoot.
i am trying to do things in an organized order. i think in years past, i was spreading myself thin, trying to do it all, at once, get burned out, and then quit it all together.
and i really need to get my ass in gear with some goals. i need to work on Feral Witchcraft before i can start reading some of my books. i want to get done studying my new decks before i start making my own.
i have been using my snow days to get cleaning done. once that is done (kitchen and witchcraft cabinet really needs it) upkeep will be easy. and then more time for me.
there are still things i need to do, i just don’t know what to do.
first, get some The Work done and then, cleaning.
i am 99% done for the month, 18% done for the year, giving me a F+. whoot!
i am very much looking forward to my big VD celebration this weekend. i hope to do all i have plan.
i have ideas and there seems to be a block in them. i know my card of the month is the Hanged Man but i am trying hard to make inches forward.
maybe it’s the weather, maybe it’s work, maybe it’s Colt, but the blars is getting bad. there is good veins of good here but, the rest can drag a bitch down.
i am 92% done for the month, 17% done for the year, giving me a F.
i have started working out. it ain’t much but it is something.
i have gotten back with working on the witchcraft. i want that done before i start reading other books.
i got the last of the Seasons of the Witch decks. i’m excited to get them studied and start the next level of my cartomancy and witchcraft.
i have my gift card for Chili’s and ready to go see Captain America. i am going by myself. i know i will be ok with that.
there’s things i want to write about but, i don’t know if i’m ready for that or if it needs to see the light of day.
it’s funny there’s things i don’t think i can’t say to Colt and Nicole but i can write them and push it out onto the internet.
i’m 144% done for the month, 13% for the year, giving me a C+.
i think my goals are set for the year. things keep popping up and i need to change things.
the lair is almost base clean. i just need to hit the kitchen.
the more i get into the various Seasons of the Witch decks, the more i keep getting excited about how this is gonna change how i want to practice.
i know the next month brings a new program, for lack of word. going with the mind/body/soul theory of working on each one, one day at a time, making forward progress and moving inches.
time to get up and do some shit.
i am 127% done for the month, 12% done for the year, giving me a D+.
i am still going forward. there is cleaning i want to do today. i am so close to getting stuff done so i can go to the next level.
i am 115% done for the month, 10% done for the year, giving me a D-.
i rock.
and i’m not done doing everything for the month.
i am trying do hard to get everything cleaned right now. February i want to start working, having each day be dedicated to mind, body, or soul.
moving forward, getting shit done, doing The Work, becoming a better person.
it’s coming up to a year on my breakup. and it really do take a year to work shit out.
it’s time to get back to it.
i am 83% done for the month, 8% done for the year, giving me a F.
go me.
go me indeed. i got my head on straight about this shit.
i am cleaning. i can not focus on any of my studies while living in less-than-ideal lair.
plus, i want this place shinier in case anyone wants to visit me.
my 5 days of fun are over. tomorrow i go back to work. i have no clue how that place will look like but, eh. i’ll start fires if needed.
Saturday i have hopes of getting my bathroom clean. 20 mins on, 10 mins off, all while listening to Unend is how i’m going to do it. i got my vanity and most of the area around it cleaned off. bathroom seems the next stuff.
i want everything cleaned by the end of the month. i think i can swing it. then i can start working on the next level.
