so i am 84% done for the month, 70% done for the year, giving me a C- grade.
and tonight, i did 20 mins of cleaning and my gods, so much got done and i feel better.
and that’s what i need to focus on, for the time being. if i can get 20 mins a day, 5 times a week, that’s that’s almost 2 hours a week of cleaning getting done. and if i go hard for 7 days, over 2 hours a week of cleaning.
i have started my 2024 list of goals and cleaning each “room” once a month is on that list. i have hopes that a cleaning once a month will keep things up.
i never wrote about my trips to Springfield this year.
and there is just one thing i really want written down.
in May, on the last night there, my and Colt left the bar and just drove around. i think the windows were down and he just speeded around in the dark on the back streets. i just put my head back and close my eyes.
i didn’t fall asleep but i was only many things that night and it was such peace. i don’t know what it was but it was peace.
last weekend, that fucker tried to kiss me and ended up with a mouth full of the side of my hair (because i can’t deal with that much love from another man).
and here i am, an AFAM non-binary who got lucky at the gay bar (on showtune night) with a gay man.
yeah, i can not handle that much love. sorry Colt.
and what sucks about last weekend was, even with me drinking and doing all the drugs in my purse, i was still the mother hen and watching over Colt trying to cross the road to put on a different pair of shoes.
Colt, i am pissed about the pic you posted on Twitter and i promise not to leave you gifts in your bed.
i can not wait for May.
well, i’m still here.
i don’t know what happened to me. i started off strong and then it all went to pot.
in the process of all of that, i am having a bit of a spiritual awakening going on. i am rethinking things and making plans.
i am also in very dire need to clean my lair. it looks as bad as my depression is right now.
i have a plan. i know i say this and fall flat but i really need to do something to change in my life and i need to set my self on fire.
i need to look over my notes from my Autumn Equinox night and go from there.
i am saving up to get another deck (I CAN STOP ANY TIME!) to do what my goddess has asked me.
i have started my 2024 list and have ideas.
i’m off to do a Friday the 13th card reading for myself and keep that Spiritual Awakening going on.
