August 31, 2016
August 30, 2016
August 29, 2016
August 28, 2016
August 27, 2016
August 26, 2016
August 25, 2016
August 24, 2016
August 23, 2016
August 22, 2016
so i don’t forget, i have this little black notebook i carry with me at work.
2015: i seem to have the problem of remembering, remembering that i am loved and that i need to take this love in and enjoy it.
2014: i’ve been blogging for over 13 years now. i don’t want to forget.
August 21, 2016
August 20, 2016
August 19, 2016
the way the other managers treated me and my manager.
2015: side note: looking back at last year’s answers, i’m sorta doing better with that.
my lack of wanting to do anything.
2014: if i could write it down, i could tell you.
if i could just sort it OUT!
August 18, 2016
August 17, 2016
crochet and get back to the gods.
August 16, 2016
August 15, 2016
it didn’t kill me when my period started.
2015: with all my walking, my calves are no longer flabby. i have to try to make them flabby.
2014: it works. i may be big and fat but damn if i cannot get shit done because my body can do it.
August 14, 2016
August 13, 2016
August 12, 2016
August 11, 2016
August 10, 2016
today, today was the day i was going to get stuff done and i didn’t. i’ll wait till next week.
and that’s my game, always next week it’ll get done and it never does. there is this thing in me where i cannot get over and out and just do.
and this afternoon it was a fight to stay awake. i wanted to nap but no, i fought it, did nothing, and feel worthless for the effort.
i need to walk. that’s not happening.
i was so motivated to do stuff last year i don’t know where it all went. i can, i can do it all but i just end up not.
i need to find my spark, that kick to do. i need something to push me.
i need someone to push me.
i need to be pushed.
August 9, 2016
i keep recalling August 2014, it was the 1st time ever i never wrote in all the long years of be journaling.
i can recall my feelings, the movie, the song, all the things just that made me stop. it made me stop thinking because real questions and events happen to me that i was not ready for.
and it hits me hard with the news that was txted to me.
when i is think of strong, it’s not so much as the physical you can take, but the mental you can take in without breaking down. i’m seeing now how well some can hide it.
with seeing what was hidden, it lifts some of the confusion but i’m still left feeling lost and confused about things.
i want to make things better, in others. i can offer my words and prayers but there is only so much a txt can be.
and being 2.5 hours away, i feel like i’m failing as the best friend.
i do what i can, the words, the txts. it feels empty but there’s not much more i can right now.
i love you DarkShark.
August 8, 2016
*uncontrollable laughter leading to tears and then heavy drinking*
2015: *uncontrollable laughter leading to tears and then heavy drinking*
2014: *uncontrollable laughter leading to tears and then heavy drinking*
August 7, 2016
August 6, 2016
German Roman Catholic school girl gone wrong/born again pagan, witch, reader, writer, heterosexual life partner, ordained minister, girlfriend, lover, hardcore crocheter, proud nerdgirl, and sister-in-law.
2014: you leave an inch of space to write down “who are you?” fuck this. i can’t write it down in just an inch. if anything, just read this whole fucking blog, this is who i am.
and here’s the kicker, i’m changing. so, you need to read this every day, and look to see what is being changed.
August 5, 2016
August 4, 2016
August 3, 2016
so much happen in July!
Matthew turned 30 (i’m dating a 30-year-old, gods). his birthday was fun. we met up for Star Trek birthday weekend.
i had on my outfit and he had on this nice ST shirt that was black and had the insignia on it. i changed to my black capris and a red tank top.
i’m @amerwitch on Twitter if don’t get that joke.
the movie WAS SO MUCH BETTER THEN INTO DARKNESS!!! that 2nd one pissed me off so freaking much. Beyond was so much better and more Star Treky and it was so sad when they talked about Leonard Nimoy Spock and then you see little Anton Yelchin, *weeps*.
they set up for the 4th with bringing in Chris Hemsworth back. we’ll see what happens.
went to Red Lobster and there is just nothing there for me to eat. if they all you can eat shrimp, i would have won.
Matthew did buy me my first Long Island Ice Tea, a top self one! i took one sip and thought “this is it?” i downed half of it and never got so much as buzzed going on.
along with that, i had a play date with Ellie! i swam around in her pool, me and Jessica tried to sort out if it’s economical to kill her husband, and damn if Emily is another being! dear gods that child!
she tried to eat me. i think this was after she had Dirt Cake too.