June 19, 2014


trying to write “Red is My Favorite Color” and i’m at a stopping point. what i started out to write, what i had planned in my head, is not what came out. and now i don’t know where to go with it.
i think this might be the first post i do that i have a works cited page with it. it’s that complicated.
i’m in a weird head space. i don’t know if this change of weather, Midsummer being this Saturday, Mom being home now, the fighting between her and Dad, this bullshit with Grandma, and all the funs with that family drama.
and i even had a nice date with Matthew yesterday and i’m still blar.
crocheting helps. i need to sit down and count my squares and see where i’m at. need to get my shit going on this damn thing. it needs to be done within 2 months and i don’t know if that’s going to happen.
maybe working 5 days in a row will be a good thing for me. get me out there and thinking about other things.
or i can just see ghostshadows out of the corner of my eye, reminders that what dreams i may hold, they don’t matter, will not matter, and i’m not needed anymore.
noon o’clock, too early to drink?

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